Fun Stuff: My Top Ten Favorite Anime Ladies

I may be all about the bishies, but I've definitely got a lot of love for some of the leading ladies of anime, too! As someone who likes to take the feminist perspective when digesting literature, film, etc, the subject of the role women play in anime is of particular interest to me. Several anime titles (especially those geared towards young men) tend to disappoint me with women whose characters are entirely dependent on fanservice and their physical appearance or otherwise dependency on the male lead(s) without any other driving purpose given, but several shows have developed fantastic heroines who have brains, guts, and emotional depths to go along with their looks. 

Here are my top ten anime lady crushes and the reasons why I love them:

10. Kaname Chidori (Full Metal Panic)

If you're going to be paired up with a dense-in-the-ways-of-love type man like Sousuke Sagara, you've got to be sharp and on your game, and Kaname Chidori is all of these things and more.  Though both a high school girl and slight tsundere, Chidori avoids the negatives of these tropes by being in many ways smarter and more emotionally on point than the majority of the characters surrounding her, even those who are prodigies when it comes to war games. Like most tsunderes, she does have issues with being up front about her personal life- particularly her growing feelings for Sousuke-- but she doesn't allow her tsutsun side to keep her from actively making sure he is safe, even from himself.  Quite a few anime ignore the fact that most real life high school girls are no longer in their "cute" phase, but are in actuality struggling the most with their relationships at this time-- first loves, the drama laden tensions of female friendships, rebelling against family, figuring out self-identity, etc- and I think Chidori felt true to the kind of girl who is not fully developed inside yet. I really enjoyed watching her come into her own and fight strongly for what she wanted in FMP's conclusion, during which shined even more brightly than Sousuke, the leading man!

9. Homura Akemi (Puella Magi Madoka Magica)

Homura is a tricky character to get a hold of at first, because the cold young lady she pretends to be at the onset of the series is a carefully placed cover to protect Madoka from becoming a magical girl. Who Homura is in reality is one of the most inspiring young female anime characters I have ever had the pleasure of watching. The magical girl genre can be hit and miss with me; I love titles like Cardcaptor Sakura which gives the leading lady some agency in a world where she wouldn't normally have much of a place (which Cardcaptors limited, much to my disgust), but titles where the female is stuck in the same fan-service geared, charmingly helpless rut she is in her every day life hit a bad note with me. However, Homura (and most of the girls of Madoka Magica, for that matter) takes her role very seriously, and understands the risks to the point where she will do anything in her power (which pretty much entails dragging herself through a living hell time and time again when she fails) to protect the person she cares about the most because of how much respect she has for the part Madoka played in her life. It is perhaps one of the most beautiful friendships in anime out there, and Homura's courage and determination isn't something I'll soon forget.

8. Blue (Wolf's Rain)

Though Blue spends the majority of the series in dog form and we don't actually find out that she is a wolf-dog half breed who can transform into a human woman until much later in the show, I grew to love her pretty quickly when she joined Hige, Toboe, Kiba, and Tsume on their journey to find paradise. The immediate concern when a woman joins a traveling part composed of males is that the series will take a dip into reverse harem territory, but Wolf's Rain is a title which focuses on the man vs beast dynamic as well as what happens when society and mankind turns on itself, so Blue's unique experiences with humans instead bring a much needed new perspective to the plot. I loved how she was able to see both sides of the equation in the conflict between wolves and humans, and was capable of falling in love with a wolf (Hige) while still maintaining her respect and adoration for the human who raised her (Quent). And even though she served as a bridge between humans and wolves, she never allowed either side to tell her how to think or feel after she learned her identity. In the end, I think she served as a turning point for several characters- Hige and Quent especially, but Hubb and Cher as well. An overall delightful character. 

7. Kurisu Makise (Steins;gate)

Three cheers for intelligent women! The focus of time traveling drama Steins;gate is on mad scientist Okabe Rinatrou, but Kurisu Makise was just as fascinating of a lead as Okabe's unwilling assistant and eventual love interest. Though Kurisu's attitude is often cold, her iciness is what keeps her safe in the man's world of scientific study. Shunned by her father for outperforming him in his own field, Kurisu still loves and wants to excel in scientific research, even though her talent is often rejected by the people she most wants to please. Throughout the series, she time and time again shows her wisdom and strength even when faced with inconceivable challenges, and the scene in which she urges Okabe to reverse a world line even if it means they can't be together anymore is one of the bravest, most poignant moments to bring a tear to my eye.

6. Ayumi Yamada (Honey and Clover)

If taken at face value, Ayumi Yamada from Honey and Clover doesn't appear to be much of a strong female character. In fact, she spends a significant portion of the series crying over the fact that her male friend Mayama is in love with another woman and has rejected her several times. But honestly, whether you're a woman or a man, if you've been in unrequited love before, you'll know how hard it is not to be terribly upset over it. Yamada has a long and winding grieving process, but the ways she views and internalizes her problematic love during this time is so magnificent and true to life that I wished that I had known about Honey and Clover the first time I fell in love. Hanging everything you are on the shoulders of someone else is rarely a good idea, but Yamada isn't quite like that. She understands and tries to respect herself as much as she can; she simply can't change the way she feels, which is something we are often told to do for our own sake, but don't actually have to do if we make that choice. She does eventually begin to reconcile herself to the fact that Mayama will never love her, but I've always been an advocate for moving on at your own speed and deciding your heart for yourself. She's by far and away one of the most impressively real characters of slice of life anime.

5. Arashi Kishu (X)

It's always a bad idea to get too attached to X characters given that the majority of them end up dying on you, but I just couldn't help falling a little for Arashi Kishu, one of the Dragons of Heaven fighting to prevent the end of the world. As somewhat of a kuudere, she doesn't talk or express herself all that often, but her heart awakens when she is forced by fate into an impossible decision. The person she falls in love with is destined to die on her behalf, and in the ­X-verse, changing predetermined fate is nigh on impossible. One of CLAMP's main theories on destiny is that the power of the human heart, manifested through wishes, is stronger than the notion of fate itself, but unfortunately for Arashi, she is unable to realize her wish before it unfolds just as foretold. Even so, her resolve is something spectacular, much like Ashura's in Tsubasa. Even if she has to sacrifice something precious to have her wish granted, she stills sees enough value in the thing she wants the most to pay any price for it. Sometimes this isn't always the right choice to make, but as in all CLAMP works, there is quite a bit of dignity to be found in choosing for yourself even if that choice comes with its own set of consequences.

4. Faye Valentine (Cowboy Bebop)

Faye Valentine is hot. She is also one of the bad-assiest females of anime, even though her bounty hunter skills are far from perfect. These days, a lot of busty action girls are turned into jokes complete with a special soundtrack for their jiggling chests, but while Faye does have her moments, she is still a very serious character with a very serious history, just like male leads Spike and Jet Black. Even though her plans don't always work out, she has enough spunk in her to last long-term alongside Spike (who has lone-wolf coming out his ears) and gives the hard hearted boys reason to care about her, even though she starts off as an interloper. She was also one of the first anime heroines I actively wanted to be like. Growing up with two older brothers, I wanted to mimic the way she stood up to them and became one of the team without giving up being feminine. Learning how to be your true self among members of the opposite sex is something that it takes many years of acting stupid for some of us to learn.

3. Winry Rockbell (Fullmetal Alchemist: Brotherhood)

I actually can't think of anything I don't love about Winry. Like Faye, I respect how she's one of the team-- and a mechanic to boot-- without sacrificing her femininity  but I think more than anything else, I respect how she was able to retain her sense of self despite living through horrors-- confronting her parents' killer, learning of the death of a man she looked up to, having her very existence turned into a blackmail tool against Al and Ed, etc. From the beginning to the very end, no matter what kind of grief she suffered, she was able to pick herself back up and fight for the people and world she loved with all her strength. I also loved her for her adorable nerdy side which sparked up whenever automail technology was nearby. In fact, Fullmetal Alchemist is simply rife with women I have a lot of respect for: Lt. Hawkeye, Lan Fan, Mei, and so on.

2. Yuuko Ichihara (xxxHolic/Tsubasa)

I can't think of an anime character I quote more often than I do Yuuko. Of course, Yuuko has a built in bonus of being one of the ones "who know the world," meaning that she's privy to knowledge of the dimensions and how the multi-world universe operates to the extent that your average civilian wouldn't understand. That being said, she has her own unique base of knowledge gleaned from witnessing many lifetimes of human behavior that makes her one of the most intelligent and emotionally wise characters of anime. She provides numerous insights into subjects that affect us all-- self-sacrifice, wanting to be considered special, pride, the desire to break the rules and lose control, revenge, envy, the limitations we put on ourselves using words-- and all of it hits at the heart of the matter that we often overlook. In spite of having an endless amount of perceptiveness, she's also simply fun to be around, and is at her heart an incredibly caring person towards those who truly matter to her. My only regret is that we don't really get a glimpse of her when Clow is alive; I really think there's an amazing backstory there that we don't know about.

1. Hitagi Senjougahara (Monogatari)

When Bakemonogatari was first recommended to me, I was not very interested even though I love supernatural anime. I had just been burned by several harems in a row where the male lead had no personality and the females obsessed with him were all stereotypes, and I simply just wasn't interested in yet another harem-type story. Luckily, the person who recommended it to me assured that the script would make the literature lover in me jump for joy, and that turned out to be the absolute truth. I was surprised by the fact that I could not get enough of the first lady introduced to the story: Hitagi Senjougahara. Male lead Araragi was enjoyable, and so were the other females who made up the sort-of harem who fortunately were not unbearably consumed with fighting over him. But Senjougahara was something else; shrewd, honest, perceptive, and incredibly self-aware. She easily narrows down the shortcomings of Araragi that tend to get brushed over in other harem titles, and knows herself well enough to where she can be upfront about what others may be perceive to be her own shortcomings. In the second season of Monogatari, she's already singles out the things that made me not as big of a fan of fellow character Hanekawa Tsubasa, and her insight has helped me learn how to appreciate her as a heroine (although she simply cannot usurp the awesomeness that is Senjougahara. Amen.)

Fun Stuff: 100th Post Extravaganza

Soooo, it's my 100th post on this blog of mine, and I wanted to celebrate in a very special way! Since 100 is the magic number, I've compiled 10 top ten lists of Asian pop culture things I love- anime, manga, music, bishounens, etc- as a way to sum up all the things I've been talking about on my blog. So, without further ado, here's your chance to learn a little about the world of Quickand2thePointless!

xxxHolic, Natsume Yuujinchou, FMA: Brotherhood, Code Geass, Hetalia, X, Tiger & Bunny, Sekaiichi Hatsukoi, Durarara!, and Nodame Cantabile.

When it comes to anime, I love supernatural/fantasy elements, male leads (not that I don't love the ladies, but Japan is a bit heavy on the fan-service, dependent types, and I like a gal who can define herself- like xxxHolic's Yuuko), and plots that lead to unique perspectives on human emotions and behavior.

Fai (Tsubasa), Yuuko (xxxHolic/Tsubasa), Subaru (Tokyo Babylon/X), Natsume (Natsume Yuujinchou), Kotetsu (Tiger & Bunny), Scar (FMA: Brotherhood), Lelouch (Code Geass), Holo (Spice & Wolf), Hakkai (Saiyuki), America (Hetalia)

The characters I love the most are strong-willed, independent, and though they are burdened by their pasts and regrets, they actively seek paths of redemption or develop to the point where they can come to terms with who they are and the world they live in.

Just a sample of what's been on my playlist lately!

With music, I tend to gravitate towards two sounds-- either the type of pop music that reminds me of my boy band obsessed childhood during the days of NSYNC and Backstreet Boys, or inspired singer-songwriter type tracks which break through the language barrier and still manage to tell a beautiful story.

Tales of Symphonia, Golden Sun, Fire Emblem, Sakura Wars, Arc Rise Fantasia, Pokemon, Dragon Age, Monkey Island, Soul Calibur, and Street Fighter

I'm a bit limited when it comes to games, since the only consoles I have access to are the Gameboy Advance, Wii (and thus GameCube), and my trusty PC. Nonetheless, I'm a huge fan of JRPGs, strategy/tactics based adventures, and anything with fantasy elements and beautiful artwork. 

Fantasy, Supernatural, Bishounen, Comedy, Shounen-ai, Shoujo-ai, Historical, Action, Music, and Samurai

Besides my obvious love for beautiful men, I also enjoy plotlines that teach me about Japanese history and folklore, as well as stories that make me laugh or tug at my heartstrings. Romances are always appreciated (hence the shounen and shoujo-ai), but shoujo didn't make the list this time since, as stated earlier, I'm not a huge fan on Japanese leading ladies (exceptions do exist, such as Toradora and Ouran High School Host Club). As a huge fan of Asian music, music themed shows are always, always on my list!

Tsubasa, Fruits Basket, Fullmetal Alchemist, xxxHolic, Rurouni Kenshin, Chobits, FAKE, Saiyuki, Tokyo Babylon, Cardcaptor Sakura

If we're being completely honest... I love CLAMP. Fruits Basket is also the first manga series I ever completed, and it immediately hooked me by pairing shoujo with the supernatural elements I love so much in the other series I read. 

Sebastian (Black Butler), Doumeki (xxxHolic), Keith (Tiger & Bunny), Greece (Hetalia), Sanzo (Saiyuki), Kyoya (Ouran High School Host Club), Kaname (Vampire Knight), Kratos (Tales of Symphonia), Lantis (Magic Knight Rayearth), Haruka (Tactics)

Looks like I'm shallow! But when it comes to personality, I like a little bit of stoicism that hides a truly sweet personality, a little bit of gruffness,  but someone who turns out being a little bit of a doof when you get to know them better.

Nico Touches the Walls, Shikao Suga, SHINee, YUI, Big Bang, Asian Kung-Fu Generation, Yuya Matsushita, Epik High, Maaya Sakamoto, Miss A.

I love all kinds of music, and these artists span all my favorite genres: alternative rock, dance pop, singer-songwriter, hip pop, throwback rap, and straight up vocal talent.

All of these have been featured as a Theme Spotlight for a reason: I love them each!

Anime themes really need to suit the atmosphere of the show, and quite a few of these were picked because of how well they achieved that purpose- I especially get into the theme if it is paired with a brilliant opening/closing video, or if the lyrics meaningfully tie back into the message of the show. I also like a bit of fun in my music, which is probably why "Kimi ni Mune Kyun" continues to be one of my favorites.

Kurogane/Fai (Tsubasa), Winry/Ed (FMA), Doumeki/Watanuki (xxxHolic), Chiaki/Nodame (Nodame Cantabile), Seishirou/Subaru (Tokyo Babylon/X), Chi/Hideki (Chobits), Kamui/Fuuma (X), Ryuuji/Taiga (Toradora), Kendappa/ Souma (RG Veda), Okabe/Kurisu (Steins;gate)

Clearly, I love how CLAMP does their slash pairings, but when it comes to het, I LOVE vitriolic couples that leave you wondering whether they'll get together in the end (although I suppose Chi and Hideki don't exactly fall into this). I love it when both the male and female characters have difficult personalities, but still find a way to make it work. As for my CLAMP... I love it when couples suffer and sacrifice for each other, always fighting for the futures that make them happy, even when it doesn't turn out the way they want it to.

Go For the Eyes: Masculine Bodily Harm in CLAMP Part 1

(The following post contains major spoilers for CLAMP works including Tokyo Babylon, X, xxxHolic, and Tsubasa. Proceed with caution!)

(Link to Part Two)

As I mentioned in my recent post on Mushishi, I often have trouble viewing characters undergoing eye trauma, and I'm sure I'm not alone in my feelings of squeamishness. And yet, as I also mentioned, I am drawn in by my favorite mangaka group CLAMP's use of eyes as a form of body horror throughout their writing, but particularly in Tokyo Babylon, X, Tsubasa, and xxxHolic. The vulnerable nature of the eye is what repels us from witnessing any harm coming to it, but in CLAMP manga, the sacrifice of an eye is not simply horrifying, but somehow steeped in moving romantic symbolism as well, particularly to their male-centric, homoerotic subtexts. But how, exactly, is this able to work out? In a subculture where romance is dominated by glittery atmospheres, flowers, and gallant bishounens, what role does sacrifice and bodily harm play in romance in regards to men, and why does it not equally apply to females in the CLAMP-verse?

A sample of CLAMP's eye traumas. From left to right: Seishirou and Subaru from X and Tokyo Babylon, Watanuki from xxxHolic, and Kurogane and Fai from Tsubasa.

Since CLAMP's fascination with the eye as a symbol does not extend to female characters, excepting Sakura's eye-kiss with Syaoran during the events of Tsubasa, it can be assumed that the loss of eye and sight has a greater significance on male bodies. Eyes are a soft and unprotected organs for both genders, but this softness is more pronounced for men who are seen as having “hard” bodies, than it is for females whose bodies as a whole are understood as “soft.” The female body is viewed (whether unfairly or not) as vulnerable on several different fronts, but should a woman wish to harm a man, she is advised to either hit below the belt or go for the eyes, since these are the two areas where he can be weakened and be made less dangerous. 

When CLAMP indulges in female body horror, such as they do is the famous violent scenes of the X manga, the feminine body is invaded, severed, and completely dismantled, leaving her in scattered pieces. The severed head, usually seen as a terrifying image, is left intact with all its earthly beauty remaining, and even though the scene is covered in blood and broken limbs, the head is still that of an innocent, untouched maiden. In short, when a woman's body is harmed, all of her perceived vulnerabilities are attacked, leaving little left unharmed other than the haunting image of her face.

Kotori's death in X  is a particularly gruesome scene of body horror which deeply traumatizes Kamui

With men, it is much less likely that his entire body will be overthrown, and thus it is natural to hone in on his obvious weakness: his sight. In CLAMP, with the exception of Magic Knight Rayearth, RG Veda, and (to a limited extent) Cardcaptor Sakura, men are largely responsible for physical conflict, and depend on their sight to see them safely through each battle. In a more figurative sense, eyes and sight are associated with perception, and how internal and external views shift based on how they are seen, both physically and emotionally. As a rule, the loss or exchange of eyes happens between implied homosexual partners in CLAMP manga (the exception being Syaoran), which also implies that the bodily harm to the eye is a physical replacement for an emotional exchange, which unlike pure shounen-ai and yaoi, CLAMP avoids in favor of tense interactions, verbal sparring, and implication-laced contact such as Fai's blood drinking scenes with Kurogane in Tsubasa and Fuuma's constant touching of Kamui in X and to a certain degree Tsubasa.

For a closer look at how CLAMP manga pairs sight, bodily harm, and the relationship between men, let's examine the eyes of Subaru, Seishirou, Syaoran, Fai, Watanuki, and Doumeki, and the additional roles of Kurogane and Fuuma in these exchanges.

TOKYO BABYLON [For more information on this text, see my original Tokyo Babylon posting] 

Seishirou and Subaru: 

The volatile relationship between Seishirou, a cold-blooded assassin masquerading as a kindly vet, and Subaru, a lively onmyoji who deals with supernatural occurrences to benefit others, served as CLAMP's first endeavor into bodily harm to the eyes of male characters. Before Seishirou's true identity is revealed, he steps in between Subaru and a deranged woman trying to kill him, sacrificing one eye in the process with the risk of going permanently blind in the other. While this incident's primary function in the text is to lead to Subaru's awareness that he is in love with Seishirou and opposed to any harm coming to him, it becomes even more fascinating when Seishirou reveals his true identity and announces to Subaru that he sees no reason why he shouldn't be killed like anyone else, and that “If [Subaru] were to die like a dog, [he] would probably step on [Subaru's] corpse and move on.” But if this is the case, why the sacrifice of the eye? Was it simply an action to make Subaru believe in his lies, a way to preserve his prey, or just instinct kicking in?

The first and last explanations are easy to dismiss. For one, this event occurs only shortly before Seishirou's true nature is exposed, so he has little reason to to put any more effort into his facade before tearing it down. Also, as the Sakurazukamori, his only instincts are to kill others and protect himself, leading him to have no natural inclination to step in on the behalf of a weaker person if it will cause him harm. The preservation of his prey is much more likely, but it still does not explain why he would allow his eye to be harmed in the process. In the manga, Seishirou explains his actions, first by saying, "I wasn't planning on protecting you, Subaru-kun. I just happened to get between you and the woman, that's all," and then, "You were prepared to let that woman seriously harm you. I preferred you to be healthy, so I got in her way."  But the question still remains why he chose that particular mode of interference when there were surely other means of keeping Subaru safe, given Seishirou's physical prowess. 

A collection of some of the eye motifs in Tokyo Babylon

The fact that Seishirou's eye was irreparably damaged points to another answer. As the Sakurazukamori, leader of a clan of the highest ranked assassins, Seishirou is responsible for performing flawlessly executed murders for the sake clients and the clan itself. Any physical handicap could become a fatal detriment on the field when all senses need to be properly engaged and no mistakes can be made. The compassion Subaru possesses cannot be shared by the Sakurazukamori, and yet Seishirou does somehow seem to have some small degree of compassion, first when he spares Subaru's life when they were younger, and second when he allows one of his tools of trade, as it were, to be permanently injured.

In both xxxHolic and Tsubasa, CLAMP alludes to “memories of the body,” in which the body acts in response to something the mind has forgotten or rejected. The loss of Seishirou's eye in protecting Subaru most likely falls under this category. Since he denies the possibility of feeling anything for Subaru as it does not fit into his Sakurazukamori persona, his body is what reacts to step in front of Subaru, even if the cost is permanent damage to his eye. The loss can be seen as a moment of genuineness aside from the fictional identity he portrays to Subaru and the Sakurazukamori assassin that does not have any room for love, and this is why it is so fitting Subaru falls in love with him at this moment after shying away from the advances of his fictional identity. In giving his eye, Seishirou exposes a willingness to give of himself that is not seen again until the conclusion of his role in follow up X.

X

Subaru and Fuuma: 

In Tokyo Babylon's apocalyptic sequel X, the role of eyes in the relationship between Subaru and Seishirou is once again emphasized, though in this case, Fuuma acts as their intermediary due to the fact that the two men are on opposing sides in the conflict for the end of the world. The Twin Star incarnation of Fuuma, though a proclaimed Dragon of Earth, plays a fluid role in the conflict that is suited towards the desires of whoever he is facing, whether they be a Dragon of Heaven or Earth. As Kusanagi points out to Yuzuriha, “[Fuuma] resembles yet doesn't resemble everyone. Like he threw away his self to play the role the people in front of him wish.”

 In other words, Fuuma has the ability to appear as whoever a person wants to see, which points to his particular power of granting the dark, unspoken desires a person holds in their hearts. At this time, Subaru is still shattered from Seishirou's betrayal and depressed by his inability to even interest the man he loves as potential prey, and deep within his heart he is still racked with guilt that Seishirou was the one to lose an eye when the one the knife had meant to hit was Subaru himself.

Fuuma recognizes this guilt within Subaru, as well as Subaru's desire to not only accept the harm that had been aimed at him, but to become more like Seishirou in an attempt to become more worthy of his notice. Throughout X, we can see that Subaru and Seishirou have become remarkably similar from their style of battling to the habit of smoking that Subaru adopted after Seishirou betrayed him. Once again, this hints at a physical exchange-- Subaru's personality and mannerisms in favor of Seishirou's-- which replaces an emotional exchange in which Subaru shares his so called “ailing heart” with Seishirou and attempts to vocalize their complex relationship. It should be noted that his dialogues on the subject take place with Kamui, a young man in a similar situation with his own friend and love interest Fuuma, and that their brotherly (or even sisterly) bond transcends the difficulty of emotional exchange in CLAMP's male/male relations.

In any case, Fuuma gouges out Subaru's eye while appearing to Subaru as Seishirou, clearing up some of Subaru's guilt issues and giving him another physical similarity to Seishirou. Though Seishirou as an individual is physically absent from this exchange, he is figuratively involved through Subaru's perception of him taking part in it. Fuuma only serves as a tool to satisfy Subaru's repressed desire, but it is reinforced that only Seishirou can grant Subaru's true wish, which is to be killed by the person he loves.

Fuuma appears as Seishirou in his fight with Subaru

In the case of Subaru and Fuuma acting as Seishirou, the loss of Subaru's eye signifies a desire to be equal with his lover and betrayer, foremost to become someone Seishirou will consider worth killing, but also to suffer the same pain he had once suffered on Subaru's behalf. Subaru's dark wish in a sense puts on Seishirou's act of compassion and reconfirms the moment he fell in love.These actions are cleansing to him and provide him some small measure of peace, though the sight of his injury is horrifying not only to the viewer, but to Kamui as well. Kamui is sympathetic to Subaru's relationship with Seishirou (unlike his counterpart in Tsubasa), but the presence of Subaru in his life serves as a deterrent to entering into the same bitter and violent cycle in his own relationship with Fuuma. Though Kamui and Fuuma have physical exchanges of their own, particularly the striking pseudo-crucifixion scene, they make it through what exists of the manga with their sight intact.

Seishirou and Subaru (and Fuuma): 

Even after Subaru loses his eye courtesy of Fuuma, the issue of eyes and physical exchanges is not quite over in regards to Seishirou. Though Seishirou maintains a mocking, carefree attitude throughout X, he is not thrilled by the prospect of Fuuma leaving a mark on who he considers his exclusive prey. Even though Fuuma reassures Seishirou by saying, “Only you can grant his true desire,” he also gives the assassin the hint that Subaru's wish “is not what you think it is.” Seishirou, at this point, is under the impression that Subaru wishes to kill him to avenge his betrayal and the death of his sister, and given his own lack of understanding of just how deeply Subaru is in love with him, he is unable to understand that what Subaru wishes for is his own end at the hand of the object of his dark obsession. Due to his misinterpretation of Subaru's desire, as well as his belatedly realized love for Subaru (if his last words are what CLAMP fans assume they are), Seishirou allows himself to die and leaves Subaru's final wish to go unsatisfied.

However, this is not quite the end of Seishirou-- at least not in the manga. Fuuma returns to see Subaru with the only remains of Seishirou still left: his unscathed eye. The eye is not a simple gift, or a treasured, if grotesque, memento of a departed loved one. In CLAMP works, magical power is often contained within the eye, such as with Fai and Seishirou's alternate self in Tsubasa, and Seishirou's eye contains his abilities and legacy as the Sakurazukamori. If Subaru accepts ownership of the eye, he will regain his sight and become symbolically “one” with Seishirou at the cost of tainting his purity as a Sumeragi onmyoji with the cold-blooded nature of the Sakurazuka clan. However, this was always foreshadowed as his destiny, as the Sakurazukamori is fated to have their title taken from them by the person they love. Subaru consents to this destiny, placing his love of Seishirou as higher and more sacred than his duties to the Sumeragi clan.

Unfortunately, the manga series was canceled in Japan due to its violence and aforementioned female body horror at a time when violence was at an uncomfortable high in Japan and elsewhere in the world, so we are unable to witness what Subaru does as the Sakurazukamori and how his relationship with Kamui is influenced by his transformation. However, the existing chapters in the manga indicate that Subaru's possession of the eye was part of Seishirou's final wish, which Fuuma acknowledges was Seishirou's desire to keep the mark of another man from Subaru's body. This final exchange is an odd form intercourse between them; in life, Seishirou could never consent to embrace Subaru while still holding onto his identity as Sakurazukamori, but in death, he essentially becomes a part of Subaru, a part that witnesses the world through the eyes of his almost-lover, the man he gave his life for.

The exchanges between Seishirou and Subaru are only able to end in tragedy

Part 2 will delve into xxxHolic and Tsubasa. To check it out, go here!

Theme Spotlight: CLAMP Edition

Since I don't think I've made it 100% clear yet on this blog how desperately obsessed I am with CLAMP (sarcasm), today's Theme Spotlight is going to be devoted to the music of the anime based off CLAMP works. As a worshiper of the original CLAMP canon, my reactions to the anime have been varied from absolute love (xxxHolic), to annoyance at an overabundance of contradictory filler (Tsubasa), to outright horror that a 10 volume series was condensed into one OVA (RG Veda), but there's no denying that the music that comes along with CLAMP anime is killer. Here are my top 10 picks:

10. "Magic Number" from Kobato: Maaya Sakamoto is a staple to CLAMP anime, from Card Captor Sakura to Tsubasa, so I was beside my self when I turned on the first episode of one of CLAMP's more recent series Kobato to hear one of my favorite songstresses at it once again. Sakamoto is a veteran on the scene, but this song is so current, fresh, and exciting that you might be surprised to hear she's been working since the late 1980s, and has contributed seven full lengths CDs to the industry. In any case, this song is practically bursting with the spirit of Kobato and made a fantastic opening to a heartwarming and adorable series

9. "eX Dream" from X: X is CLAMP's dark and broodingest (now a word) emocalypse (also a word), and they were wise to stay away from anything too perky for this series. Masatoshi Nishimura/Myuji provided an emotional and atmospheric rock opening with "eX Dream," which is spot on for the theme of the show, although whenever I sing along, I mess up and say "Drowning for my life" rather than "Burning for my life." Whoops!

8. "The Starry Sky" from Angelic Layer: I was half-and-half with my opinion of the Angelic Layer anime (loved the action, hated the meddling with the original pairings), but I loved the closing theme from HAL. HAL brings that nostalgic 90s sound which I often find myself missing, and delivers a solid vocal. Oh, CLAMP from the olden days... -sniffle-

7. "SONIC BOOM" from Tsubasa: Wait, Maaya Sakamto again? While it's true Sakamoto is an idol of mine, this track would have probably given me a swift kick in the heart even if I hadn't known it was her. After the insane opening to the Tsubasa Shunraiki OVA I was already bawling my eyes out courtesy of Kurogane and Fai, and as soon as this beautiful and heart wrenching track about losing the person you love started I was so out of control thinking about Kurogane, Fai, Syaoran, and Sakura that the waterworks only got worse. And the violins.... AND THE GUITARS ON THE LIVE TRACK!!!! Aaah, yes. So this is love I feel.

6. "Let Me Be With You" from Chobits: Winning the most adorable track in existence award is Chobits opener "Let Me Be With You" by Round Table with Nino (and I'm pretty sure Nino is Rie Tanaka's alias, because it sounds/looks just like her). This song is pure, sappy romance at its best, and I don't care if the sugar is piled on high, because I want more of it!

5. "Yuzurenai Negai" from Magic Knight Rayearth: I mentioned 90s nostalgia earlier with Angelic Layer, but this song is the very definition of it. Whenever I hear this track, I think back to the glory days of InuYasha, Ranma, Kenshin and all the fun and action that went along with them, and I get all warm and fuzzy inside. I still want to be Umi, Hikaru, and Fuu even at 21, and I love this song for all memories it brings.

4. "Catch You Catch Me" from Card Captor Sakura: I have a difficult relationship with this series. I loved the manga and the Japanese Card Captor Sakura, but the horror that was the American Cardcaptors cannot be forgotten. Moving the episode timeline, giving the characters American names, diminishing Sakura as the lead, cutting out canon pairings (TOUYA/YUKITO!?!?).... it cannot be forgiven. However, the CLAMP original and Japanese editions are not to blame, and this song from Gumi proves exactly why this series was perfect in its native land. Poor American children brainwashed by our stupid reinterpretation...

3. "Peony Pink" from CLAMP Campus Detectives: May I also add that Japanese shows for younger audiences are boss? Card Captor Sakura featured a whooping number of homoerotic situations (Everyone of every gender having the hots for Yukito, Tomoyo lusting after Sakura, Yue lusting after Clow, etc), and CLAMP Campus Detectives had elementary school students Akira and Suoh with kindergarden aged girlfriends. And kicking the collective butts of grown adults alongside young womanizer Nokoru. In any case, the brilliant theme was performed by the baroque duo Ali Project in their milder years, which makes for an interesting comparison to their newer stuff. It's light and fluffy like the show, but an excellent listen.

2. "Ningyo Hime" from Chobits: Chobits makes the list twice for spanning the whole range of emotions. After the joy of "Let Me Be With You," Rie Tanaka shifts gears into the deeply bittersweet "Ningyo Hime," an ode to desiring love no matter how badly it hurts. As Chii herself phrases it, "If the someone just for me doesn't choose me, I'm afraid the hurt will be so bad that I'll stop working. It's a powerful feeling, isn't it? A hurt so strong that it could cause you to break." Commence sobbing. Thank you, thank you, Rie Tanaka.

1. "19sai" from xxxHolic: On a happier note, I am in love with Suga Shikao. Yes, I know he's an older man, but I just can't help myself! His chillaxing CDs are always a favorite on my Ipod, but I never would have discovered him if not for the glory that is the first xxxHolic opening theme "19sai." The song is catchy, fun, and smooth, and was just what I was looking for in the show based off my favorite manga. It was the first show where I had ever listened to the opener for every one of the 24 episodes, and even after I finished season one, I burned it to every mix CD in existence and listened to it some more. God bless those 19 year old days!

Fun Stuff: Creative Memes for the Artistically Challenged

I really wish I knew how to draw. Every time I go onto DeviantArt, there are art memes after art memes that I wish I could do, except for the fact that my drawing ability is still at a juvenile level. The only character I'm half way decent at drawing is Mokona, but when it comes to actually coloring him, I get lost when it comes to shading, shadow, and variation of shade (and yes, this still applies to an all-white or all black animal-creature thing). So I have to content myself admiring the work of others while my own ideas fester in my head. *tragic sigh*

What I can do is write. Fanfiction is a huge thing for me, and it for the most part makes up for my lack of artistic ability. But at the same time, I can't help but eye those memes and wish I could fill them out. Sometimes when they are Top Character Memes or Anime Boys From A to Z, I can just copy and paste official art and put my own twist on it through the backgrounds and lettering I use, and other times I fill out the memes using text instead of images. One meme I frequently come back to is the OC Meme Remix, an art meme for writers, artists, etc who have their own original characters and want to explore how these characters react in different situations. As a Fanfiction writer, I don't usually invent my characters, but I love using this meme to delve into the characters of the shows I'm watching and test their personalities, put them in cracky situations, and see how well I really know them before I write about them.
(The original creator of the OC Meme is not longer on DeviantArt, but if you search OC Meme Remix, you can find some people who have used the template that you can borrow from).

Turning this meme into a writer's meme is easy enough. Simply write down the names of ten characters (original or borrowed or whatever the hell you want) and answer the questions (or draw within the template if you do have drawing skills) based on the numbering system. Since I'm currently rewatching, X, I completed the meme based on my favorite characters from the show. Keep in mind, you can answer the questions in many different ways. You can write a sample fiction narrative as the answer, write out a straightforward answer as brainstorming (as I do here), draw a picture, scribble down whatever comes to mind, or simply imagine the scenario in your head. That's what I love so much about these memes: they're just plain fun to think about, even if you don't have time to draw or scribble something down.

For me, it will be yet another foray into the CLAMPdom, this time using the X television series. 

First off, list the ten characters in any order you want (and please forgive me for leaving so many characters out, X has a massive cast):

1. Kamui Shirou
2. Sorata Arisugawa
3. Subaru Sumeragi
4. Yuzuriha Nekoi
5. Fuuma Monou
6. Seishirou Sakurazuka
7. Arashi Kishu
8. Kusanagi Shiyu
9. Princess Hinoto
10. Kakyou Kuzuki

Now for the questions:

1. 4 (Yuzuriha) invites 3 (Subaru) and 8 (Kusanagi) to dinner. What would happen?All I can think of is how awkward this would be for Subaru. First of all, Yuzuriha has this whole lovey-dovey thing going on with Kusanagi (age difference be damned!), and secondly, he is too busy being in the throes of Seishirou related emo-ness to handle being around a relatively happy couple. The image I get out of this scenario would be Yuzuriha trying to spoon feed the beefy Kusanagi ice cream (to go with his sweet tooth), while Subaru sits in the corner fondly remembering the days when he had this sort of relationship going on with Seishirou. Too bad Yuzuriha didn't think to invite Kamui so the two guys could mope in their mutual pain together. 
2. 9 (Hinoto) tries to get 5 (Fuuma) to go to a strip club? How does that work out?
   Well, this is interesting set up. Hinoto can't exactly leave the Diet Building given her physical condition, so any stripping would have to happen in the special room where she is kept. Immediately I imagine her arranging for her protectors Souhi, Hien, and Saiki to do the entertaining. It would quite possibly be the most solemn striptease of all time, and I can't imagine Fuuma having any interest in it. If he did go, he would probably spend the whole time trying to sext Kamui rather than actually watching the show. Fuuma strikes me as the kind of guy who would much prefer fondling and licking the neck of his childhood friend than watch amateur strippers shake their stuff... if Kamui was the stripper, on the other hand...
3. If you could stay at a character's house for the night, who would it be? 1 (Kamui) or 6 (Seishiriou)?
   Now this is a tricky one. Kamui is clearly not in the best of moods throughout X (and how!), and he honestly has every right to be. If I chose him, we'd probably spend the night having an emotional heart-to-heart without any fun involved. On the other hand, choosing Seishirou is a lethal choice that might end up with me being killed. Regardless, I'd have to go with Seishirou. I want to hear his stories about the adorable Subaru from Tokyo Babylon era, and then pray to God that he doesn't kill me for knowing too much about his precious prey when the night is over (he probably would, anyways).
4. 2 (Sorata) and 6 (Seishirou) are making out when 10 (Kakyou) walks in. How would they react?
   Oh God, Sorata and Seishirou? Eye gouging would be the natural response (this is CLAMP, after all!), but then again, Kakyou can't exactly walk into the room to begin with. If he did manage to see this horrific sight, I'm sure he would enter into an angsty rant about how Hokuto sacrificed herself so that Subaru and Seishirou could be happy together, only to have Seishirou go behind Subaru's back and fall in love with... uh, Sorata of all people. Seishirou wouldn't take too kindly to be interrupted and would probably kill Kakyou (take that Mr. Only-I-Can-Grant-Your-Wish-Fuuma), and then he would have to be killed by Sorata as per the fate of the Sakurazukamori, which would lead Subaru to retaliate, and then Arashi, and surely the Dragons of Heaven and Earth would kill each other without Tokyo being involved in the process. All because of Sorata and Seishirou making out.
5. 3 (Subaru) falls in love with 6 (Seishirou), and 8 (Kusanagi) is jealous.Well, Subaru being in love with Seishirou is nothing new, but throwing Kusanagi in the mix... makes things quite interesting. I can't see Seishirou and Kusanagi in a relationship, so I'm going to imagine Kusanagi is jealous because he's in love with Subaru. And who wouldn't be? He seems to have a fondness for dark haired skinny people, and as soon as he sees a photograph of the young Subaru, it might be enough for him to try to knock Seishirou out of the picture. The easiest way to do so would be by joining the Dragons of Heaven, and once Seishirou is taken out, moving on to wooing Subaru with the things he enjoys. But what does Subaru dwell on at this point? Seishirou... sakura blossoms... inverted pentacles... Seishirou... gouged eyeballs... having an ailing heart... Seishirou. Good luck with that one, Kusanagi.
6. 4 (Yuzuriha) jumps you in an alleyway. Who rescues you: 10 (Kakyou), 2 (Sorata), or 7 (Arashi)?Well, being jumped by Yuzuriha is not much of a concern considering that she is a fourteen year old girl and about half my size (she does have the power of Inuki on her side, but still). If I did managed to get hurt from the exchange, I doubt I could count on Kakyou, who is physically incapable of lending a hand, so I would have to go with Sorata. He seems to have a "I need to protect you!" complex towards Kamui and Arashi, so it would only be naturally for him to extend it to a girl so lovely as me.
7. 1 (Kamui) decides to start a cooking show. 15 minutes later, how is it going?
   I can see Kamui as having decent domestic skills (he is living alone in Tokyo, after all), but he's completely lacking the charisma to pull off the show in his current state. I could see him doing all the cooking begrudgingly, but refusing to narrate his actions to lend his viewers a hand. He'd end up with a tolerably made meal, but would be left stymied that everyone is calling in and complaining that they can't keep up with him. If he can do it, everyone else must just be weak, right?
8. 3 (Subaru) has to marry either 8 (Kusanagi), 4 (Yuzuriha) or 9 (Hinoto). Who do they choose?
   Another tricky one, considering Seishirou isn't on the menu. Subaru is a nice guy, but strikes me as a bit of a masochist at points, although he did fall in love with the nice veterinarian Seishirou before he continued to harbor feelings for the soulless murderer Seishirou. That being the case, I'm going to have to go with Kusanagi, who is closest to who Seishirou was pretending to be when Subaru fell in love with him. Guess Kusanagi lucks out after all! I think they would actually make decent non-sexual life partners, even though I could honestly never see Subaru getting over Seishirou. Which is too bad, because Kusanagi possesses the makings of a good seme...
9. 7 (Arashi) kidnaps 2 (Sorata) and demands something from 5 (Fuuma) for his release. What is it?
   Well, the only thing Arashi wants from Fuuma is to grant her wish of Sorata not dying for her, so I'm not exactly sure kidnapping Sorata himself would be an effective bargaining tool. Besides, there is literally no one in X who Fuuma would be in a hurry to spare. Not even Kamui, even though he would probably rather kill Kamui himself than have Arashi do it. CLAMP logic at work here. So no matter what Arashi decides to do, Fuuma will most likely laugh at her for being stupid. Silly Arashi.
10. Everyone gangs up on 3 (Subaru). Does 3 have a chance in hell?
    I will give Subaru credit for being a pretty kick ass fighter, but since he is described as being as equal in strength to Seishirou, he would be dead in two seconds if Seishirou and Yuzuriha, Kamui, Fuuma, Arashi, Sorata, and Kusanagi ganged up on him. Sorry Subaru.
11. Everyone is invited to 2 (Sorata) and 10 (Kakyou)'s wedding except 8 (Kusanagi). How do they react?
    I doubt he would be too troubled considering Sorata is a Dragon of Heaven and he never really interacts with Kakyou. Also, a wedding between Sorata and Kakyou would have to take place in dreams since I don't think it would be legal for a man to marry a mostly comatose body (but then again, who's to say?), so only Hinoto and Kanoe would be able to attend. Besides, Kusanagi is too busy dealing with his love affairs with Yuzuriha and/or Subaru to care at the moment.
12. Why is 6 (Seishirou) afraid of 7 (Arashi)?
    Because he knows what will happen when she learns he was making out with Sorata earlier...
13. 1 (Kamui) arrives late for 2 (Sorata) and 10 (Kakyou)'s wedding. Why were they late?
    Assuming this wedding actually does manage to go off, Kamui has two reasons to be late: 1. He was brooding or 2. He was busy saving the world and all that boring stuff. Not important at all, huh?
14. 5 (Fuuma) and 9 (Hinoto) get roaring drunk and end up at your house. What happens?
    Ignoring Hinoto's immobility issues, I can only imagine Fuuma being a drunken sexual predator (I will accept his advances, of course-- he's quite the looker, and he can look like whoever you want him to) and Hinato as someone who makes up crazy as hell stories and tells them in a loud and slurry voice. Hey, she's a dream-seer  so we can't exactly prove her wrong, can we?
15. 9 (Hinoto) murders 2 (Sorata)'s best friend (Kamui?). What does 2 do to get back at them?
    An interesting thought considering that Hinoto does try to off Kamui several times. Also the best form of revenge (quitting the Dragons of Heaven) would work into dark Hinoto's plans, so that's not such a good idea. So instead, Sorata would have to get crafty and switch the whole 'fated battle for the end of the world' into a touching 'let's all hold hands, forget our differences, and sing Kumbaya' moment, thus proving her dreamseeing ineffectual and tossing a wrench in dark Hinoto's plans. Out of all the characters, I believe whole-heartedly in Sorata's ability to make the world made of LOVE AND PEACE.
16. 6 (Seishirou) and 1 (Kamui) are in mortal danger. Does 6 save himself or 1?
    Mortal danger in X? Impossible! Anyhoo, this question does not need to be asked. Seishirou would save himself. And happily kill Kamui in the process. And Subaru would still be in love with him.
17. 8 (Kusnagi) and 3 (Subaru) go camping and somehow forget to bring food. What do they do?
    Kusanagi is against harming nature, so he wouldn't go for any wildlife. He'd probably use his tough-guy skills as a defense force dude to scout the area for fruit or edible plants whose loss won't harm whatever forest they're in. He would have to share his findings with Subaru, who is too busy being moody by the fire to realize he's hungry.
18. 5 (Fuuma) is critically injured in a car crash. What does 9 (Hinoto) do?
    Normal Hinoto would do a victory dance (or a victory mind dance). Dark Hinoto would be sad that her drinking buddy/strip club friend has been taken out of action. And then she would have to find a new way to kill off the Dragons of Heaven (go Team Yuto!)